Long Time

Well it has been awhile since I blogged and to be honest alot has kept me from it. This amazing spirituality that has bloomed in me has been truely hard lately. I know that I have a path... it is just so hard to know if I am doing it right or not.

I took in 3 homeless people this week... I figured that if I was going to talk the talk I should walk the walk.............and I know that your going to say that I am crazy after the hell that I went thru earlier this year with my roommates that took everything that I owned. But as I told Darren one day if I stop helping people then they have won the battle. (they as in the demons) Those are the inner spirits that want you to believe evil in everything.

But anyway..... here goes what has been going on. I met Rick at the bus stop where he was out begging. I gave him $2 knowing that he would buy beer with it.... but was amazed that he bought the beer for a homeless friend with severe DT's...... How amazing is that? Well instead of getting on the bus and going to the Strat for breakfast I decided to go meet these people. I was entralled with their wanting to hear what I had to say about my love for my God.... now to be honest I saw a couple giggle about me being an escort/sex surrogate/minister.........Hell I would giggle over that one. I invited them home for a BBQ (after all I am famous for my parties) I brought them home, got them showered, clothes washed and fed. They filled my heart with the knowledge that I made the right choice and did not go with my fears. Ruth got a job yesterday (she is my heart) Ruth is a 50something true goddess that fell on hard times but never lost her amazing grace. Doug is her BF and he has an interview today and I think he will be working tomorrow.... he is my hardcase in that he does not want to not drink........ then there is Rick I adore him..........but his demons are beating him unmercifully. You see he does not have to be homeless, he is doing it to self punish. But in the end I see them transforming everyday.

I know that it isn't an overnight thing, my transformation is going on a year now..... but it is hard for me sometimes... I feel that I never get a day to just be me and have fun without trying to fix someone.........now I shouldn't bitch my blessings are many!