Feel Like My Hands are Tied

It occurred to me today that I have been begging for 3 years to start a church that no one wants and save children that people would rather drug than help flourish....... I mean I am nothing more than a porn bitch after all. I bet if I sold panties that I don't wear I could get enough to help others. What has become of people that no one cares? Is there no hope for the planet? Maybe 2012 will be destruction rather than rebirth. I know that I am fine. I was promised along time ago that my family and friends would be fine through all of this........ now here is the teaser.... are there any true people that deserve redeemtion?

What if I can prove to you my gifts? Would people finally listen? Well lets try it............in 2 hours lay down, you will start feeling a vibration through your body until it builds into a headache. If I am right then you need to rethink ur views on God and helping

We Need Help

Morning Star Retreat

Morning Star will feature new age spiritual beliefs and health programs
non-religion based spiritual meetings and classes
alternative medical practices
colonics
accupressure
accupuncture
chakra realigning and charging
sensual healing
alternative infertility treatments
reiki
healthier food behaviors
organic gardens
energy healings
animal energy healings
meditation gardens


This is my Dream and I believe that this was my purpose, I have seen the miracles that sensual and spiritual healing can do! I was suppose to die 5 years ago from Lupus and now there is no signs what so ever of Lupus. I know with a firm belief that God will guide us to miracle healing modalities that it will happen!

I need donations to get this all started and it can only come from true believers in Gods amazing grace..... Look at the changes that he has done in mine and Ricks lives.

If anyone wants to donate to help me with any of this I have a paypal acct setup under Earthgoddesscarla@gmail.com even $5 can make a difference in many lives.

Thanks So Much and Many Blessings
Rev. Carla Holland-Strange

My Testimony to God

My name is Carla, I have gone thru most of what you have gone thru right now............ since I recieved my calling I have lost everything... I am now homeless after living in a mansion. I watched your show this morning and I am trying to ask God for my reward.........but most times I feel beaten down.

You see I was a well known Porn Producer and Actress that woke up one day and realized that God had called me to service.... I walked away that day to serve God......but lost every material possession I owned while doing it.

since being called, I have lost even my childrens baby pictures and photo albums........ lived on a rock, in the back of a truck and even in AA meetings (when I am not a drunk) I have discovered the joy of helping people that had even less than me... being there for them when no one else would, and even forgiving those that openly attacked me. Don't think that I am looking for Sainthood, because I know that isn't me. I had the opportunity today to go back to my old life and do a video today.... and put a roof over my head. But I can't do that either. God has shown me too much of the light to go back into the dark. If you take anything at all with you from my testimony please take this one thing.......... when times look dim....when you feel totally alone....... close your eyes RAISE your face to the sun, breathe the sweet air and tell God I love you unconditionally........... like he does you. You will feel the calm, tranquil love that he has to share. You will realize that you are not alone.......... the things that make your life hard make you strong! Many Blessings Carla Holland-Strange

Multifaceted

I don't think many of you understand who and what I really am, you see someone in the adult business and that is pretty much all you see....... but there is so very many more facets of who I am.

I grew up in small town Mineral Wells TX as the school geek named Carla Michele Holland, My mom was a 16 single mom and my dad ran as fast as he could.... to later raise and LOVE many other kids. ..... this fueled my single parent concerns. I was red headed, freckled face and as popular as a rock.

Then I grew up into a girl that fantazied about the romantic first love, the amazing marriage......... the pureness. It does not always happen that way, I married a man 9 yo than me had 2 sons, 4 miscarriages and not one orgasm....... that last 3 years till I caught him with my best friend.



Then I started revolving around the adult world and I found my nich...... but before that I had worked as a waitress, library aide, curb and gutter, roofer and beaten wife.

I found a true calling in the adult world as a "housemother" at the clubs rather than as a dancer (though I am an excellent dancer) I was a great housemother because I truely cared about the girls....I kept them safe. I believe that is the Mother Spirit in me.

I started escorting to bring in better money to raise the kids, by then I had 3.... I never had a pimp ever!!!!!! But the girls still would call me to help them and keep them safe........ I went into great detail that no one should do this unless it was a calling a true love of what you were doing and not to support addictions or men. I then married a wonderful man that raised my children and loved them as his own.

Same with my Adult Video Carreer as a talent agent, it isn't meant for everyone. Only get into videos if you know that the future is way past tomorrow...... your film carreer will follow you!

Now I am so rapped up in God and charity that I can't even support myself financially, but without this love of God I don't think I would have been strong enough to get thru this last year! My birthday is May 2nd, and this time last year I had lost everything including my pets and was put in jail for Domestic Violence.....what a way to spend your birthday! I did not know it at that time, but that was the begining of my transition to my awakening to the pure love of Gods Spirit....... I finally have that pure love that I dreamed of as a child.

I will start my ministry even if I am broke, I will help the homeless, the hungry, the sex workers, the drug addicts, the drunks EVERY chance I get and I will do it unconditionally........ Pure love is Unconditional.

Many Blessings
Rev.Carla Holland-Strange
and proud to finally feel that I desearved that in front of my name

Gosh I am getting Bad

Sorry I haven't blogged in awhile, but I have been so busy getting ready for the new show... It starts next Monday at 7pm on adultbroadcastnetwork.com. Then I have been still looking for investors for my retreats, surrogacy programs, and real estate flipping.

Well Doc verified that I am pregnant yesterday. Which in my heart I never believed because I had a hysterectemy when I was 23! Taylor is apparently attached to my abdomen wall, They want to do an abortion but I would never do that. If I had that mentality I would not have Amanda right now..... my doctor wanted to do an abortion when I was pregnant with her and now I am still here and she is my joy. I don't like doctors they have given me a death sentence so many times, and I am still here.......... there was the pancreatitis, lupus, cancer, 2 strokes, Ludwig Angina and God has allowed me to remain on this Earth. So I guess I will do this bedrest thing as much as possible. I am eating great food, I was getting alot of excercise by swimming, and walking (still going to try alittle bit) until I start hurting again. I do my meditation and prayers 50 times aday and I stay centered.

Rick has become a problem child though. I started dating him to get over Joe and it has been a nightmare, it has been like being with Steve Murphy again except that I am a stronger woman this time and am not afraid of anything or anyone. so I am telling him today that he has to go!

Anyway we are doing a photoshoot today and I am going to post some photos of me and Taylor...She is going to be perfect I am sure of......but I need your prayers cause it does take a village to raise a child and I won't let a Doc condem her to death........soooooo pray in Gods name for my baby to get here safely........... ONLY In GODS name please. Point A to point B!
Carla Holland-Strange

Special Knowledges and Sensing

Many Blessings and Good Morning

I tried to write this last night, but my little computer fairey just woould not let it go thru.....guess it wasn't the right time for it.

As most of you know, I get alot of visions since I nearly died in Dec, in fact on Dec 24th 2008 I did die for a couple of minutes. Well One of the Visions that I have is that Michael Jackson is NOT dead, I think that the world got too much for him and he felt that he was better to his kids to not be here. Well the reason this is so wierd to me is that I am not a fan, nor do I get star struck, been around alot of stars in my business. I believe that he was railroaded with the child molesting thing... special wierd people with abilities are strange, but NEVER harm a child. It just is not in us.

Now there is one thing if you just want to checkout, but another if someone else is getting hurt thru this, that Doctor tho he should never enabled the drugs, did not kill anyone. So Michael comeout from "under ground" and take responsibility. I knew I was right when your best friends did not attend your memorial. Sometimes you trust your friends with knowledges more than your family..... I know other things that I won't put in here.... but it is more proof that I know what I am talking about.

and No Mom and Kaye this still won't let you put me away for being a nut..hehehehehehehehe! I am still taking care of myself, working, keeping my weight off, praying everyday, escorting, but staying true to my God and knowledge that he loves me...... no matter how I earn my living. Because in A Course in Miracles I learned, our Bodies are Temporary Our Souls and Spirits forever

The Unknown of Healings

Well this was a wierd day and it totally knocked me out..... I have been alittle upset with Debbie and I decided not to go over to her house today for the photo shoot, but got one of my crazy signs that a I needed to use my gift with a friend with lung cancer. Now you got to understand that I don't understand this gift at all.... when I started with Patty, she seemed to get alot worse with her back. So of course it scares me when the friend has fucking lung cancer (and there is tension between us) so how is that going to work?

Well I got there and you could feel the tension down to my spine.... in fact it felt like I walked into a toxic dump site.... then add on that there were 5 god/goddess energies there. Now a God/Goddess energy sounds heavenly but it isn't (think that is why I was miserable at my Moms) It is hardcore draining power struggles. Well I had barely been there one hour and Deb started throwing up and I became physically depleted.... you see it is as painful for the healer as it is for the ill (and top it that it is an ill Goddess ... Oh My) i haven't been drinking any wine for awhile, but had to numb some of the toxcins running thru me.

Except for Patty, who asked me to rub her back (cause she felt that I could heal) No one has ever known that I was doing a heling when I hugged them goodbye and asked God to heal........ so tomorrow is a huge knowledge for me....... I know that Patty is healing (degeneration of the spine) but am I strong enough for Lung Cancer?

Well I guess only time will tell..... soon as I got home It knocked me out and I woke up to blog all of this 6 hours later.

Many Blessings
Carla Holland-Strange

I need a Miracle

I have been studying "A Course in Miracles" for awhile now, and everything in it rings true.......Now I need a Miracle. My Ex Daughter In Law just called and she and my Grandson will be homeless in an hour... Well I am 1300 miles away and ust now getting back on my feet.......EVERY single day I start my Mornings by casting out Blessings to all that read my blogs......... Times are Hard and Money is tight so ALL that I am asking for is people to send me their BLESSINGS, not Prayers But Blessings...that is Major to me........ My God will do the Rest

I think he does not believe that people care anymore and I want to show him that they do, even if it is words of Blessings..... you see prayers are asking for something..... I am praying for Blessings. Blessings are a Beautiful Gift......... you tithe when you give a gift.

So Please email me your Blessings at earthgoddesscarla@gmail.com